Ok , so notwithstanding what I wrote two posts back, I couldn’t resist Googling black cherries in salads. Here I was trying to be healthy, and to my horror most of the recipes were Jello- related.  The one that wasn’t  sounds damned good:  Black Cherry, Bacon, and Goat Cheese Salad.

I, of all people, should not have been surprised by the over-reliance on Jello to deliver black cherries to one’s palate because I have been known to encase canned black cherries, pineapple, cream cheese and other things I’m too grossed out by to say in black cherry Jello. It’s one of those weird family traditions that goes back only as far as my elementary school’s fundraiser cookbook when my mother, for some inexplicable reason, decided to make  Coke Salad one holiday. No doubt the wordplay, simultaneously accurate and incongruous–an oxymoron in Jello– is part of its appeal.  Not to mention the physics and chemistry–liquid yet solid; soda yet salad. I get a hankering for it only around New Year’s and Easter though I’ve seen it referred to in print as a staple at post-funeral buffets in the south. I’ll be sorry to miss it at mine.

It’s sweet beyond measure, so sweet your teeth hurt. I attribute at least three of my fillings and perhaps two of my crowns to Coke Salad. I can not in good conscience link to that recipe. Don’t do it.  I do feel guilty for denying you the pleasure and the pain of dirtying up a pot, blender, and bowl with the purpliest color food (?) ever invented, but perhaps you’ll understand I’m doing this for your own good when I tell you that I renamed the aforementioned Jello concoction Purple Glop. That pretty much sums it up. I am a little sad that no photo exists. I might need to make a batch just for the photo op.